Sometimes we feel responsible
for other people's actions and feelings,
hence we accuse ourselves for our behaviour
that caused those actions..
"Why did we do this and not that, how could we ever think about it etc..".
Ignoring negative feelings, fear and stress
will not just harm us,
will also destroy relatioships with the beloved ones,
will obscure our daily life and will not solve anything at all..
The following example from the book
"Art of meditation" by Robert Elias Najemy
is an accurate one.
It shows the relationship between
our fears and the way we keep them locked in our subconscious.
"There is fire in the bedroom of your house.
There is a long corridor between the living room and your bedroom,
where you have also stored all of your vaulable and whatever is important to you.
Imagine that one day you find that there is fire in the bedroom
but you do not feel that you have the ability to handle this fire at the present
and you close the door and ignore it and pretend there is no fire.
Gradually the fire burns its way into the corridor and still you ignore it
and pretend that it does not exist because it pains you to realize,
or believe or admit it exists.
You feel ashamed of this fire and it makes you feel inferior, weak, hurt
and out of control.
Thus we pretend that there is no fire and that all is fine.
But how long can one can go on pretending before
the fire gradually burns its way into all the rooms of the house
destroying it entirely??
As long as unresolved feelings are locked within us,
they will destroy our nervous, immune and endocrine system
from the inside just as the fire will destroy the house from within.
These feelings will destroy more than our health, however.
They will undermine our feelings toward ourselves,
our feelings and relationships with others,
our success in our various endeavors and most of all
our happiness and inner peace.
Thus ii is absolutely essential that we not be afraid to open that door
to the subconscious and begin to allow that fire to evaporate out
into the atmosphere. We can then remove the debris which exists within
and which fuels that "fire".
This process of letting these subtle tensions out
is called un-stressing."
